Oh God, Oh God~

first week of class... and im NOT liking it already.

now tt is bad, really bad.

i could hardly keep up with wat the lecturer was saying, esp sat's class - i was practically yawning thru out the lesson. *yawnz* and it doesnt help tt the guy was from china. oh gawd, his accent's just plain distracting, nvm the fact tt he was coming across as an over-enthu environmentalist.

i remember telling myself on my way home from school tt i would read thru my notes during the weekend since i wasnt following the lesson as i shd haf.

but guess wat, i watched kim sam soon for the ENTIRE weekend. to which i mean from the moment i was conscious and all the way till slping time.

now tt is bad. REALLY. BAD.

i need a disciplinary master.

pronto.

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:'(

i am officially $4,252.50 poorer now! *wails*

all tt mths of slogging, scrimping and eating leftovers (ok, i was exaggerating on tt last bit) have been reduced to a cold "Thank You" from SIM for paying my course fee online. W-T-F. y do they only take citibank and OCBC credit cards?? y issit so bloody difficult to process a request for permanent increase in credit limit?? y do they haf to charge reinstatement fees for paying late?? (isnt it always better late than NEVER?!) and cun the world be more pragmatic??? WHY??!! and just becos of these bull on rules and regulations, my bank account is instantly diminished of $4,252.50 upon a click of a button! A BUTTON! *wails*

I HATE SIM!

~~0~~

i was at a wake yesterday nite. somehow, i found it extremely awkward walking into the void deck alone. fortunately i spotted mum somewhere and walked over to her immediately. it was weird to see my cousins and relatives, and even weirder to see my bro in-law and sis together with nicole. i was like, who's tt guy wif my sis? he suddenly seemed so tired and old. sigh. i guess tts how most ppl are in such trying times.

feeling out of place, i busied myself with folding the paper ingots. all of a sudden, i remembered telling myself how ugly my paper cranes are and how i couldnt even fold a paper crane nicely. i remembered asking myself constantly, "wat am i doing here?" while folding the cranes. i recalled the pain of seeing tt familiar face being reduced to a mere photo forever. i remembered tt excruciating pain of standing beside tt wooden thing and talking to her while trying to fight back the tears but bursting out eventually. i remembered a nice ns officer asking if i was alright. i recalled seeing the panic in my friends' faces when they tot i had gone missing when i was in the toilet. i remembered tt stranger bringing me to tt wooden thing and promising her tt he will take care of me (forever?). i remembered believing in tt promise cos who could lie to her? i remembered hating myself for being borned in january and missing tt last walk with her. i recalled sitting at the void deck of another blk alone, writing her my tots for the first time and reprimanding myself for realising too late.

i remember so much.

is there any way to stop remembering? Please?

My WebCAM

My new WEBCAM everybody! cool huh? made in spore somemore!

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ehh.. wait a minute.. doesnt it look like some "stuff" ppl burn at some "events"?

New Term

so today is sept 11 - 1.

and i cun believe sch starts tis week!! its seems like just yesterday im on my 2-mth vacation, living a slacker's life and enjoying the simple moments (and jin san soon!!!) and in a blink of an eye, 2 mths' gone! just like tt! *snaps finger*

i had really really intended to start my driving lessons during my vacation, i've even started my sch late (supposedly starts in july) just for tt purpose. but somehow, tt didnt happen. sighz. now im undecided, shd i take my driving lessons in addition to my evening classes? somehow, tt notion just seems suicidal.

ah, yes. i got my results a couple of weeks back. unexpectedly, i passed all my papers, even tt killer econs which i tot i'll flunk for sure. its a huge sigh of relief for me, cos i've already made plans for wat i'll do if i actually fail all 4 papers. so glad i didnt haf to go down tt road. and i realised sth, even in wat seemed the lowest period of my life, i managed to grit my teeth and pull thru it. alone. guess it aint tt big a deal afterall.

so there, a new term is starting and i really really gotta focus to get tt 2nd upper class degree.

and its gg to take a hell lot of effort.

Shayne Ward = No Promises

best come-hither look i've seen by far... and my god, those lips! awwww~